“Very Bad Things” might seem like an unimaginative title for a movie, but there is no better way to describe the events that unfold in this wonderfully dark, twisted late-90s black comedy. It’s not easy to get hold of and – afaik – is relatively unknown ? , but if you enjoy watching the rapid, spiraling descent of the human condition with this (´⊙ω⊙`) expression on your face, definitely check it out. (I mean, it stars Christian Slater doing his very best Christian Slater so you win regardless.)
This is a spread for looking at your life, your poor choices, and laughing despite it all.
— THE MESS —
[Tina] The Problem – You fucked up. You really fucked up.
[Michael] Cause of The Problem – “I fucked up.”
If we’re sticking to the story, then this is impulsiveness of some sort; an immature, rash decision/s based on pleasure-seeking, instant-reward type behaviour.
— WHAT INFLUENCES HOW YOU DEAL WITH THE MESS —
[Boyd] The Problem Solver – “If you take away the horror of the scene… do you know what you’re left with? A 105-pound problem that needs to be moved from point A to point B.”
Ego-driven self-preservation (completely lacking in conscience) that will resort to anything and everything to stop you from being caught/held responsible for your actions.
[Adam] Guilty Conscience – “Goddamn it, they’re onto us!”
The Superego’s conscience maxed-out to the point where it makes you mad with paranoia from the desire to confess confess confess!!
[Kyle] Moral Conscience – “I just want to get married.”
The Superego’s Ideal Self; that part of you that truly wants to be good, but is stuck between doing the right thing and wanting to keep everybody happy.
[Charles] Fear – [Boyd:] “Follow my orders!”
The Id as the undeveloped, frightened inner child who is too overwhelmed to make decisions for itself, and so will go along with whoever expresses their will most forcefully.
— THE END RESULT —
[Laura] The Outcome – “This is my day!”
The ultimate result of letting your Ego crush your Moral Self; of allowing self-interest to manipulate your decision-making.
ha ha h aha h a good luck
I basically have two modes of operation: bleak as the moors in the dead of winter, and whimsical af, and “Adventure Time” caters perfectly to my pink-ALL-THE-THINGS, glitter-loving, inner 4-year-old. It’s silly without being stupid; oddball without being disturbing; and creative without being obnoxious. There are strong female characters of every flavour and between all the adventuring in a possibly post-apocalyptic world, it deals with real emotions, relationships and sensitive topics.
It’s just really good, okay?
 How You Bring Magic to the World…
 And Inspire With your Imagination…
 By Being Completely Yourself (no apologies)
 Connecting With Your True People/Tribe by…
 Utilising Your Creative Adaptability (adaptable creativity?) to…
 Getting Your Message Out There (in an understandable fashion)
basically, Lemongrab is me.
One of my top 5 favourite children’s books is “Cranmer the Crocodile” by Roy Machon (Starfish, 1976). I’ve read it dozens of times throughout my life and can remember specific moments when it has comforted me (usually curled up in a sunny spot, on my stripey towel). This book is so important to me that I emigrated with it! Like most children’s books, it has a ~message~, but the delivery is sweet and gentle, rather than preachy.
Cranmer has different likes and interests to the other crocodiles, who tease and then shun him for his oddball nature. Cranmer wants nothing more than to fly, and tries all sorts of things to achieve this (and falls FLAT ON HIS FACE every time). After many failures, he sits dejectedly on his favourite rock, wrapped in his signature stripey towel, when a strong wind comes up.
The wind catches the towel and pulls Cranmer into the air. He is frightened at first, but then realises that he is flying! When the wind lets up, he drifts gently back down to his favourite rock. The other crocodiles still make fun of him, but Cranmer knows the truth and waits patiently – and contentedly – for another windy day.
 What Makes You Different – you odd little crocodile
 Your (IMPOSSIBLE??) Dream – “You can’t do that. You can’t be that. Why can’t you be normal?”
 Past Failures – trying to be something you are not, leads to misery
 Grab Your Stripey Towel – wear your uniqueness proudly; evolve naturally
 Here Comes the Wind… – success (and happiness) comes when you don’t force the issue and are true to yourself
 Now FLY! – (and take a big ol’ shit on everyone’s heads while you’re up there)
 Tell Big Lies – Get creative with your personal narrative to keep it exciting (for you, and everybody else). Cover up with an even bigger lie when you get caught.
 Your Audience – Be an agent of change in this shitty world by giving of yourself where it will make the biggest impact (even if that big impact is small) because…
 Steal People’s Things – … sometimes you just gotta be petty to get through the day (keep this impact small too)
 Realise It Doesn’t Matter – Stop wasting your fucks where they don’t apply to #2 above because…
 Be Ballsy – … YOLO ffs
 Top Tip – life @ you: you’re welcome
The Pop Culture Spreadcraft Challenge was run in April this year, by tumblr user blacklilydivination, who has since gone private. I wasn’t doing very well, and was feeling the tarot burnout bad, but I did manage to complete a few days (and then only because I used polyvore to create them). There are several more still languishing in draft form, but I ran out of *throwing my hands up in the air* everything. My spreads were posted on IG and tumblr and… I don’t honestly know why I didn’t post them here. The burnout was just that. bad. I guess; I couldn’t take the pressure of trying to be -serious- about it.
I’m lumping them all together below if you prefer a quick look at the lot, with the list of prompts if you need inspiration for created your own pop culture spread. Each day will also get its own in-depth post with a full explanation of the positions and inspiration behind the spread.
Day 1 | Day 2 | Day 3 | Day 4 | Day 5 | Day 9
Haven’t started interpreting this monster yet, but there are some very interesting placements even at first glance. I used the LXXXI Tarot – The Quareia Magician’s Deck just to level up the difficulty, because I’m a fool ? I guess ? The DAGIM block especially is pinging my brain hard, and what’s with the Fates all gathered together there at the top of the wheels? Hmm.
Every year around this time I tackle Rahdue’s Wheel, and every year I have to go scratching through my notes to remember the layot and positions, and every year I scribble down another mess of a reading, only to find myself repeating the process all over again.
In case you aren’t familiar with RW, it’s a beast of a reading that uses all 78 cards in the deck. Now that alone is enough for me to be all over a spread, because I looove a challenge. I love a spread that pushes my skills and intuition to the limit; I love the feeling of my brain gently leaking out of my ears as I try to focus on keeping all the pieces of a spread in order and make sense of it. LOVE it. But the prep work for this spread is a pain in the ass, so this year I got smart. I made a template.
But even the goddamn template was a pain in the ass to draw up, so I got smarter. I made it digital.
And in case you, too, find yourself overcome by the sudden masochistic urge to break your brain on The Wheel, I’ve made the template available as a PDF which you can download here! It’s not elegant – it’s a lot of information to cram into a relatively small space – and the numbered positions are only meant to be large enough to record the card names, not full interpretations (though there is just enough room to scribble a few first impression notes), but this allows the whole spread to be summarised on one page.
Now have fun stretching those tarot muscles!
Rahdue’s Wheel is from “Tarot: The Handbook for the Journeyman” by Eileen Connolly. I haven’t read this book, but first came across the spread at the Occult Corpus forum, and later the Psychic Visions blog, which is where I got the information to build this worksheet from.
Back in the “good ol’ days” when the internet was just a box filled with thumb-tacks and assorted bits of string, finding a new tarot deck to pine over was a momentous occasion; something to be savoured and right-click-saved in 56dpi 150x200px format so that you could look at it again and again, lovingly memorising whichever cards you were lucky enough to find (*COUGH*MARY EL*COUGH*) You knew your chances of ever actually owning it were laughable, which somehow made living with the desire much more bearable.
But now? Now everything is accessible and available and so, when you find yourself in a position where you can’t just right-click-add-to-cart-see-you-in-3-days, it huuuuuuuuurts. It’s almost a mental struggle to understand no… can… has… thing? whY? why no can has?? Soft, overly-privileged, pathetic 21st-century creature – your ancestors are sucking on dehydrated cow asshole and clucking their tongues in your general direction!
There are so many beautiful, imaginative, uniquely creative decks either available or in pre-order or funding status right now and our dollar has never been worth less (in my history). Even funding a “local” deck = $50 minimum! What hurts even more than not bringing the deck home to my loving embrace, is not being able to support the artists who have put these glorious works out there (and who are probably in equally dire financial straits).
But until I learn how to make stone soup, there’s another bit of Depression-era wisdom that is helpful for putting things into perspective when I find myself experiencing an attack of the whinges:
Want vs. Need Spread
Of course this spread isn’t just for dealing with #decklust – it can be useful for any situation where you find yourself dissatisfied and restless and thinking more will fix it. The cards can even be drawn without an actual question/situation in mind; let the cards pull that information out of you as you read the spread. If you’d like to see a – shockingly literal and heavy on the sass – example of what I mean, just…